ok boomer

I have been reading and hearing a lot about the growing discord between Millennials and Boomers. I read an article recently that laid out the angst Millennials are feeling because the older Boomers are not retiring like they were supposed to have done by now. The argument goes, a boomer, which I am one, have had their run and now its time to step aside and let the younger ones take over. I asked some of my children if this was how they felt and they affirmed the angst passionately. They stated clearly that many of their friends feel that they are being limited in advancement, in income, in respect, in success because boomers will not leave. The issues seem to stem from the misunderstanding that boomers are not tech savvy, not creative, not leaving. One survey states that 66% of millennials believe boomers are the roadblock to their career advancement, 1% think boomers tech savvy and 2% think boomers are creative. As a boomer this is a hard swallow. Didn’t boomers help create the tech abundant world we live in, didn't boomers invent the internet, didn't boomers create the cell phone. Yet, being the father of several millennials I have to step back and look at this divide with an objective eye, which we all know is no easy task.

I remember when I was in architecture college way back in the 20th century and computers were just becoming prevalent. I scoffed at the idea of using a machine to create what most of us saw as an art form. We spent hours, days, weeks creating beautiful drawings to express our ideas, how was a machine ever going to be capable of what only a human hand could produce. Well, today I draw nothing by hand, computers and myriad software programs have allowed my productivity to increase tenfold, all our lives have been affected by these tools.

My second job as an architect was with a firm of about 30 people and I had a supervisor, Bud, who was 49 when I met him. I was twenty years his junior and full of desire to succeed in a world that was highly competitive. The first day on the job, Bud took me into his office and sat me down and told me he was going to teach me everything he knew over the next year, I chuckled inside because he had been practicing for 25 years. The next year was one of the most profound times in my life. This older silent generation man taught me to be a better architect and man. Day after day he pushed me, inspired me, taught me, challenged me, disciplined me and most of all encouraged me. When I think back on that year I learned how to be leader, a follower, a team player, a servant, an architect. I know if Bud had not been willing to invest his depth, his passion, his mind to fulfill the potential he say in me I would not be the person I am today. I also know if I saw Bud as an obstacle to my success I would not be the person I am today. So when I hear my children tell me to get out of the way something in me pushes back. I have a depth, a wealth of experience, of wisdom, of knowledge I can impart onto others. This position was hard won and has never made me better or superior to anyone. It has shown me it is my duty, my task, my goal to help those younger to fulfill their potential. This passing on, this mentoring, this showing is an essential part of how the world functions. Imagine a world where there is no one to learn from whom has gone before, no one to teach, no one to show, no one to follow. Millennials are in a unique position, the great recession has made it difficult for many boomers to retire, the frustration is real. Yet, it is essential for us all to see the value in learning from those who came before.

Today I am at a point that I am comfortable with being an architect, I feel a certain confidence in my ability, in my knowledge. I am still learning, trying to keep pace with the onslaught of technology that pushes my profession forward. I am at a point, if I stop I feel I will have wasted all the years, all the Buds, all that was given to me freely by those who had gone before. Yes, my children’s generation may be suffering in some way, yet their wish to have the sages, the voices, the mentors leave will end in disaster. It all reminds me of Rehoboam, Solomon’s son who on the death of his father ascended to the throne. One of his first conflicts as king was dealing with the heavy burden Solomon had placed on his people. On hearing the people’s plea to lighten their burden Rehoboam sought the counsel of older men. He also gathered his friends, the young ones to ask them and his young counselors told him to increase the yoke Solomon had placed on the people. After three days Rehoboam made a decision to disregard the advice of the wise older counsel and embrace the younger counsel. The result was a division of the kingdom, Rehoboam’s dismissal of the older wise counsel resulted in hardship, in conflict and ultimately the destruction of the kingdom.

My hope, my prayer is that my children and their generation will see the value in having us older and yes wiser ones around. If they decide to follow the path of Rehoboam they will be destined to repeating the same mistakes, the same destruction. My task as an older one is to seek a way to reconcile this angst, to build a connection with the younger generations. I must seek ways to show them what I have learned and how those lessons will ultimately make their lives fuller. So today go seek out one younger, one older and ask them to talk through the frustrations, the doubts, the desires, the realities of living in a community. Together forge a path to success that is a collaboration of old and young. Build a community where diversity of age, of abilities, of ideas creates a more powerful, a more driven, a more thoughtful way.

out of balance

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